Ascertaining Meaning 

Someone suggested that I expound on what it means to me to be BB’s little pet. Perhaps the more accurate question is what it would mean if I could be his pet. After all, I’m really not his pet now. I might never be his pet if it’s not what he wants. 

In the interests of full disclosure, I think it would be some combination of his babygirl/little princess and his pet (meow 🐾). For simplicity’s sake, I will refer hereafter to pet but I mean all of the foregoing. 

I think the heart of the issue is I want to be his completely. If I could be his pet I would be free to express all of me to him. I would be vulnerable and allow myself to love him the way I have I think subconsciously avoided doing all these years for fear of loving too much; having too much to lose. As his pet the real me could bubble to the surface and in my dreams he would express his love for me back as my Daddy, strict and adoring. Here’s the rub, though. He does love me. He loves me ferociously and deeply. I know this. I just don’t know that he wants to express it the same way I do. To his credit, he’s trying to get on board with “this”… 

Every time we try to talk about this and I try to express how I feel and what I want, I end up crying. I just get overwhelmed and emotional. It’s insane and I’m sure I’m not helping. 

For years I thought that kink was just sex. The only sex I wanted, to be sure. I mean literally the only thing that’s ever turned me on, ever. But in the past six months or so I learned what more it is and what I could be for me. D/s is a language, a manner of expressing oneself. And it somehow feels like unless I can express myself that way and unless BB reciprocates in the same manner that I’m in danger of losing out on something very important. Maybe I’m measuring myself against others or a D/s fantasy I’ve created. But to be his pet I would be 

  • Adoring
  • Adored
  • Submissive 
  • Dominated (i.e. loved and protected)
  • Free (but deliciously bound as much as possible)

   
Image from Google. 

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4 thoughts on “Ascertaining Meaning 

  1. It is very emotional. It takes time to change the way you interact. It’s been over six months on the Dd/bg journey for us and it’s still getting better everyday. Some days just feel “normal” but we still have to live in the real world. Last night I was kneeling at the window just listening to the rain and he came up and said scoot over and knelt with me. Not something he would have done before. Just little things that are changing.

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      • What does he say? I get that. For the longest time I had the same worry. Mine may not have the drive and desire to do this on his own but he loves me and is willing to try. He sees what it does for me and for Us. It may be slower going because of the motive but the change is real.
        I do have to keep opening up to him and let him know what I would like. I thank him a lot and tell him how the things he does make me feel.
        I think it isn’t that he needs to do those things but he likes the response I give when he does them.

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  2. You are being very brave by examining your feelings; well done. “As his pet the real me could bubble to the surface”. I understand the importance of being one’s true self and being accepted and loved for it. My Daddy wants the same. He desires to be open and loved for who he is. It was my attitude, femininity, littleness, and vulnerability that drew him out and opened Him. For us it also a closeness. The google images that evoke such emotion and desire for something we find hard to describe with words. I still tell my Daddy about this “thing” I want to feel because I can see it in a picture. We had to find those things in our life and make them ours. He orders for me at a restaurant. He did this on our first date before our D/s. He buckles me in His truck and opens my door. All before our D/s. It gave us something to build upon once we looked at the things that are natural in O/our relationship. Now he thinks of it as protecting his property.
    – I like how you list adoring. Makes me think of all the ways I can be adoring and show adoration. As you put it “expressing myself”. Listening while he speaks and never interrupting. Now that is not shown in any google image but what do I see in the image above? Eye to eye contact, playfulness, and the erotic but playful pet attire. How is the man expressing? I have gotten way off topic… sheesh. I feel your pain in wanting what you want. It is a yearning that does not disappear. I had it. I have it. I have been lost in that D/s fantasy before. Make your own way and as ToraPrincess says go slow.
    “Last night I was kneeling at the window just listening to the rain and he came up and said scoot over and knelt with me.” I am picturing that and it is so beautiful. It evokes more emotion that the image above. He expressed his love by kneeling with you to watch the rain. OMG that is lovely.

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