For the past several months, it seems like things have been at a standstill. Following reasonably positive opening discussions, I became crazy busy with work, and BB with his school and final exams. It was a crazy time and I guess we never prioritized us particularly. So, there’s that. The other issue is that I keep trying for the follow-up discussion. The part where BB tells me something. Anything. I need to know what’s going on in his head even if I can fairly deduce at least some of it. It feels like I’m the sexual deviant out on a ledge all alone. At what point does refusing to engage in the discussion mean I’m truly on my own as opposed to just being uncomfortable with the subject matter? I really don’t know.
Now, BB is done exams and free for the summer. He’s been away but I’m seeing him later today, finally!! I’m not looking forward to raising the topic again if it’s going to be another deferral/avoidance. Should I do it anyways? Or do I wait for him to be ready to talk about it (in 100 years)?